The mommy cut…
Just the name brings to mind images of moms in high waisted, light colored jeans. Perhaps the mom in question is also rocking an ornate Christmas sweater, even though Christmas was months ago?? And along with the charming outfit– the requisite mom haircut. Wash and go. That is my fear.
Although I’ve always said I wouldn’t cut my hair short, I’ve been feeling the urge to do just that. On one hand, it would just be practical. I end up putting my hair into a ponytail nearly every day anyway and when I don’t, it’s pretty much just hanging around my shoulders in a static laden mess. I do still enjoy how it looks if I blow dry it, and curl the ends- but seriously, when do I have time to do that???
Also, Molly takes great joy in grabbing fist fulls of mommy’s hair- and then pulling with all her strength. It’s been through this little exercise, that I’ve learned that a 7 month old can be ALARMINGLY strong! It’s not at all uncommon for Molly to go to bed at night, with several strands of my hair, still clasped in her little iron fist.
Practicality aside- I do like long hair, I always have. It’s not so much that I’m worried about “looking good” or something. It’s more that when I picture “me” – long hair is just part of that picture. It’s not like I’m contemplating a buzz cut or anything- but still cutting my hair, even to my shoulders feels like a big change. I actually like shorter haircuts on lot’s of people, so it’s not that I have something against shorter hair. It’s just hard for me to picture short, on me.
I worry that if I cut it, I won’t feel like myself anymore. And is shorter hair really easier to care for than long? Will I morph into just a wife, and mommy- but lose my individuality? Or will the change be exciting? Will it help me see myself in a new way, and visibly mark this new chapter of my life, called motherhood?
To cut, or not to cut…..that is the question.
I just sent you a small novel in an email responding to this blog 🙂
Love you!
okay heres the thing…i think i kind of understand why you’re nervous about cutting your hair, i mean if the change of being a mommy weren’t going on…would you still be nervous about cutting your hair? I love your long hair, but heres the thing, it will grow back! it is only hair and if you are feeling the urge to cut it, it will not change who you are, but maybe it will be good to cut it just to experience that ya know? like sometimes if i’m really nervous about doing something that involves changing something i’ve sort of grown to associate with myself, it always helps me to do the change, and actually reaffirms my “self” (with or without the hair) so i say…go for it, and if you don’t like it, there are always wigs and it will grow back:) there are alot of cute cuts right now that people get, some up to shoulders, layered (which i think you actually had when you were in ireland and when you came back from ireland?? and it looked beautiful!) but anyways…you can also go up to chin and get a cute pixie kind of look that way. whatever you decide, i think it will be a nice growing experience to change something like that! (this is coming from the girl who dyes her hair every other season though lol so only do it if you want too!)
almost forgot, (its nik in the note above) i started a new blog on this thing but don’t know how to leave my name instead of real life travel and leave a link? tried below but if it doesn’t work heres the new blog
http://thereallifetravels.blogspot.com/
Laura- You are too sweet. You make some good points. I hadn’t thought about cutting my hair scaring Molly. Also- you make an interesting observation about how a haircut can cause a woman to draw on their femininity from somewher other than their hair. Lots to think about- thanks for such a thoughtful response!
Nic- I added your new blog to my blogroll! How fun to keep track of your travels! Also thanks for the comment on hair cutting. You make some great suggestions also- and your right I did have it layered and somewhat shorter in Ireland. I’d forgotten about that! Sending you hugs! Thanks:)
yaye you have me on your blogroll!! coool! yaye you did, it looked really pretty, i remember it was layered and like up to your shoulders.
I’m really, really fluid with my hair…sometimes it’s long, sometimes it’s short, sometimes it’s blue, sometimes it’s brown. LOL! I call it my art project. Whenever I feel myself getting too attached to a particular style–I change it. Which seems counter-intuitive, but I feel like my hair is sort of metaphorical–and I don’t want to ever stagnate and tread water in my comfort zone. I want to always be reaching, changing, growing, cutting away parts of me which lead me away from who I truly want to be.
Just remember that cutting your hair isn’t permanent. It grows back! 🙂 It can be very fun, and enlivening to start the day with a brand new ‘do!
Before I started cutting my own hair– I would go in and my explicit directions were “Do anything you think will look good–but absolutely, positively NO mom hair” lol!
Okay, I totally did what they say “never do”…I cut my hair while pregnant. I then proceeded to cry (hello prego hormones) for the next 2 weeks – okay not constantly, but much more than ‘normal’. So, now, here we are 1 year, yep Jackson will be turning 1 next week 🙁 AND I have not cut my hair since. Yes, Jackson pulls it. Yes, it is mostly in a ponytail. Yes, it takes a long time to do. However, I realize that my hair is part of what I feel makes me, me…and nothing reaffirmed that more than after the cut, Zach looking at me and saying, Momma, I don’t like it. So, if it is for convenience, don’t do it…if it is just time for a change and you are tired of it…go for it!
xoxo